Vacation Time!

After a week and a half of zero alone time, I enjoyed an amazing morning of snuggles, Sesame Street and pouring rain with my favorite little person. It was needed and perfect. Now, my mom is here to help me with the rest of the day. The surgical recover business is no joke. And I'm so ready for it to be over.

I got to thinking about what a wonderful life I've had and how blessed I am to have such an incredible husband and baby. Even on days when I feel like I'm barely holding it together, I'm still so blessed.

And the little seems to be living a blessed life herself.

This summer we did LOTS of traveling. From Charleston, to Costa Rica to Honduras and more, we definitely hit the skies often this year!

So, in reverse order, I thought I'd share a few pictures from our vacations.

This is from our most recent trip. We took a cruise out of Galveston to Roatan, Honduras, Belize City, Belize and Cozumel, Mexico with my grandparents, aunt and uncle and their kiddos. We had a blast and it was SUCH an easy vacation with a kiddo! Crazy easy.

My aunt with Lainey

Daddy and Lainey

after diner shots...which I couldn't participate in because I was pregnant.

dancing

swim time!

my and my love after a long day of play

my uncle and his daughter doing the dancing with the cast routine

and Lainey and my aunt watching

my monkey meeting her first monkey!

with her great grandpa

chillin

watching everyone zipline

a quick snooze on great grandma's chest

when she saw this she yelled, "daaaadaaaa!"

the monkey stealing Lainey's paci

even mommy got to have some fun!

we decided it was best to just let the monkey keep the paci...

Honduras...which we LOVED!

Honduras...which we LOVED!

Honduras...which we LOVED!

Honduras...which we LOVED!

Belize

Cozumel. One of my favorite places.

she hides her feelings well ;)

Cozumel

Cozumel

Cozumel

Cozumel

She can be quite destructive...and I LOVE it!

We really had a fantastic time. I have so many more pics and if I was sure you'd look through 190, I'd post them all!

I'll post about Costa Rica soon!

Also, I used to be jewelry rep and I have tons of unworn jewelry that I will be selling soon so keep a look out!

But life goes on, and shopping may help

I've decided that I needed to make a come-back to blogging world to help grieve our loss. It helps me talk about it and it helps me move forward. Sometimes at night, I dream about our little one and Sweet Husband says he hears me talking about the baby in my sleep. However, after about a week and a half, I am happy to report that last night I was able to go to sleep without pain medicine. (if you've never had a tube remove, let me just tell you that it's painful!) So I feel good today. 

I've been reduced to online shopping constantly because the cabin fever of post-surgery has set in. I've been spending lots of time finding my favorite outfits, buying outfits for the little's birthday and even shopping for Christmas...already.

I know many online shoppers and bloggers are beyond familiar with Shabby Apple but I am such a fan and so excited that Shabby Apple has offered a sweet deal for my readers.

Shop Shabby Apple by September 14 and enter the code favorite10 for 10-percent off of your Shabby Apple purchase.

Some of my favorites include the Champs Elysees, the Bette D., and the Serenade. 

Some of the best sellers are:

1-  Alice

2-  The Red Queen

3-  I'm Late! I'm Late!

4-  Ingrid

5-  El Capitan

6- Elizabeth Islands

 

And of those six, my favorite is the Alice, adorable!

So, lovely readers, happy shopping. It helps me get through the tough times and hopefully will bring a smile to your face as well.

It's a deep sad

It has been almost two months since my last post. Life has been crazy. The little one is growing quickly and she is a perfect little person. I adore her more than I ever thought was possible.

Being a parent is the most amazing experience that I've been blessed to have. Sweet husband and I have always wanted a little group of kids so this summer we decided to try again for baby number two...and it happened QUICK! We found out we were pregnant just before heading out on vacation and we were thrilled to death.

Unfortuntely, it was an ectopic pregnancy. I woke up last Sunday with intense pain in my abdomen and kidney area and headed to the emeregency room where I found out that I would have to undergo surgery because the baby made his or her home in my fallopian tube and the tube was rupturing and they would have to remove my tube and that the baby would not survive. It was the worst day of my life.

Two doors down from me in the OR was a woman giving her child up for adoption. I overheard the doctor telling the nurse she didn't want to meet the baby. I was, and am, overcome with grief and hurt. Here I was grieving a baby that I wanted and this woman refusing to even see her baby that she was giving up.

It was put perfectly by my sweet friend and college roommate, it is such a deep, deep kind of hurt. One that I am not sure I will be able to get over or move past.

I do know how blessed I am to have my precious little girl, but I also know what I am missing out on. I know the sweet, perfect little life that I will never get to meet or watch grow up. I'll never know if the baby was a boy or a girl. I will never know who that baby is.

For now, my heart is confused. It's sad and overwhelmed at our loss. It's happy and blessed to have what I do. It's angry and hurt that I wanted a baby so badly and lost it when women are having babies they want nothing to do with.

I feel like life is a rollarcoaster and I'm on the big drop down.

For now, I'm off to enjoy my baby girl. I've come to realize I may need her more than she needs me.